Prepare for the Apocalypse: Get a Cabin Upstate

  |  July 6, 2012

That was the message of this ad, which appeared in last Sunday’s New York Times (we were already at a Catskills cabin, so we missed it). Prepare and Protect NYC‘s marketing campaign is either ingenious, deeply cynical, earnestly catastrophic, or some combination of the three.

Enemies of the United States already have the ability to paralyze our society, they say, so we should all have a cabin in the Catskills to which we can escape in the event of an emergency. (By the way, it took us six hours to drive to western Sullivan County last Friday afternoon, so we’re not sure how easy it’ll be to get to said cabin if darkness really does fall.)

These cabins are sold as “safe houses,” and include:

  • Water
  • Aquaculture – Not only will be be breeding fish for food purposes but we also have a stream on the property with an abundance of wild fish to augment our bred stock.
  • Hydroponic gardens with vegetables
  • An initial three month supply of nonperishable food for each family. Then, every three months during the first year (unless world events make it impossible), more food is added for each family until every family has 12 months of nonperishable food put aside.
  • Around the clock security

But, hm, you may notice on the website that there are no prices for these rustic luxury safe houses, and that the banner shoes a lovely, molded, mid-century daybed. We’re thinking it’s a hoax. You?

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